Keeping Busy

KIMG1246It has been a while, and I am not even going to apologize anymore for the lack of writing. Life is busy right now in general and has been for a while. I think it is just the boys growing and changing and we are trying to change with them. They are not the little boys they used to be – no longer are they little or dependent. Younger boys, I think I have the hang of, for the most part. But now, they are growing (some are even taller than me now – hard when I get frustrated and then I have to crane my neck to look at them,) and they are blooming even more into their own person – independent, testing new grounds, expressing new wants and desires.

Baruch Hashem. This is ultimately what we want from them. We want them to grow into independent people who can participate in society. I really cannot complain, it is just hard to constantly have to be one step in front of them to guide them properly. There is no book that tells me how to work with *MY* teenagers. That book has not been written yet.KIMG1248 However, I have found that with lots of sincere looking and sincere davening (and tears don’t hurt either,) eventually Hashem helps guide us in the right direction. We are getting the hang of it. In the meantime, I have learned that it is good to keep them busy with things – either school, fun stuff or otherwise. Some boys get bored easily and then that is not a good thing, and some need to feel accomplished, so we try to get them to help us out and do things such as plan wood working projects where they get to plan and create it all basically themselves for they really can do it now.

I have made a few changes over the past few weeks. We had been doing a 4 day week schedule for several years now and I really liked how we could have Fridays to cook for Shabbos and clean and do errands, etc. However, lately I had been feeling so overwhelmed for we would not be done until after 4:30 pm and then I would go straight from there to getting ready for supper and after supper was cleaning, evening routines and
KIMG1196getting ready for bed. I was worn out before supper time. So, I have reluctantly moved to a 4.5 day schedule. Just moving one class over to Friday morning really helps. With the change, I now usually get 30-45 minutes at least before I have to start with supper. We are not doing all I had been wanting to do. I was excited to add in our Nature Study – which we have done once. Nature walks have happened most weeks, and one sketch per walk does happen. Mr. Little and I were sharing a drawing book, until he told me to get my own. Just showing his own little independence. 😉  Last month it was nice to go to “Our Spot” by the creek at the Nature Preserve which had boys creating dams from various nature articles. It classic spontaneous homeschooling at its best.

Also, as per Charlotte Mason’s schooling, I have started to put together a little list of some handicrafts that would be fun to do. One boy is in the middle of a wood working project for our backyard and two more are working on sewing puppet-wallets combos either for themselves or for cousins and not to mention the one who bought for himself a guitar and is anxiously waiting for his lessons to start. For one boy, we are really strongly encouraging him (aka “making him do it,”) to do more laining. He likes doing it and it is really good for him.KIMG1226 Unfortunately, it looks like this year we are not going to be home for him to lain his Bar Mitzvah parsha since it falls out over Thanksgiving and we go visit family (but he was practicing it anyways today and it was nice to sit and listen to him even if he was mumbling it very quietly.) Oh, and I cannot forget that it has been cool enough now to enough some learning outside.

When I started writing tonight, I was thinking that things were not really going as nicely as I would like and somehow the days slip by and schooling does not feel like it is going well, but as I continue to write and recount what really has been going on, I am reminded of all the little things we have started and how that really adds to what can feel very monotonous otherwise. Perhaps the year is going better than I KIMG1243thought it was. Yes, we have our growing challenges, but the fact that they are happening while learning at home has been such a relief. One boy who is having a few more growing pains than others at the moment can do his lessons at a different time if he is having a more difficult moment. I am learning to be flexible (even when I don’t think I can bend any further) to help him out. When I am stretching and flexing with him, he almost always comes back when he is composed and ready and then asks for his daily work to do, and it can be all be done in a very calm and loving (but firm when needed) way which is such an added bonus for everyone. Not such an easy task for a school, but definitely something that can be done at home.

So, I feel as if we have embarked upon a brand new journey this year. It is definitely not as simple as it has been in the past, but it is something that will definitely make me grow and that is exciting. I have learned and grown a lot over the last 10 years and I am looking forward to seeing the new me. I just have to remember to keep my eyes focused on our end goals. It also does not hurt to occasionally put myself in time out and either just veg in the bedroom, or make myself 1 chocolate chip cookie. Just for me. Out of sight. Just one. I may have done it today. And if I did, it really did hit the spot and made me feel so much better, it was nice in one of the little new ramekins that we bought last week. Don’t ever underestimate the power of 1 cookie. Especially one with chocolate chips 😀 Be careful to not make it too often!

Revisiting Ambleside Online

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I was not going to buy books. I just wanted to look. 😐

Well, it’s that time of year again. I have been working for days trying to get a schedule going for 4. Yes, Mr. Little is not so little and will actually need to have a schedule of his own. I am so glad we are doing a Charlotte Mason styled learning, I would hate to think how things would be going otherwise. A CM styled learning allows me to teach more than one child without me going crazy. (I am going to apologize here for the lack of pictures, I have not gone out too much lately for one beautiful boy had a bike accident and now has one leg all straight in a cast. A black one. In 100 degree heat. 😐  )

I still remember sitting down at the computer 5 summers ago. I was just not finding what I wanted. Money was a big issue, and anything I wanted to do cost money. I remember the boys were at a camp, with one little one at home, and I spent all morning on the computer. Searching.  I remember noting somewhere that I saw “Free” written beside a link. It was not what I was looking for (so I thought), but it had been several hours and I had nothing, that after I exhausted the page for what I thought I was wanting, I decided to go back for I might as well look at whatever that was that had “Free” written beside it. It was one of the most amazing things I could have done. No, it was one of the most wonderful gifts from Hashem.

At that point I had three boys learning, with one who just started walking. I started reading. I honestly felt my heart racing. I clicked from page to page, reading everything I could read. The whole concept of whatever I was reading really felt good. I remember thinking, “This is what I want for my kids! This teaches middos (character traits)! I can have time for all my kids!” Whatever this was was a G-d based curriculum that was geared to raising well rounded children with good middos.

I typed to my husband about it and sent him some links, saying that I found something really neat! No, I don’t intend on doing this, don’t worry, but it is so interesting and so what I am looking for! (So why was I not going to do? I am not sure, but I knew it was not for me. *cough*) I went to see him at lunch time and again, briefly told him about this so interesting new thing (I still was not sure what it was), and knew I was not going to do it but it was so interesting!

After lunch, I had to go back and read everything again and then again. I just could not stop. By the time I had to get my boys from camp, the decision was made. Whatever this was, and I was still not quite sure what it was, for it was a very different kind of way of teaching, this *thing*, this is what we are going to do. This is what I need. The schedule was all laid out IMG_20150810_082138for me, in a way that made it so easy to use with our family, most of the books I needed were available for free, linked to right from the website, for they were out of copyright books, and the best thing is that it was free. The philosophy so matched our family.  This is what I always wanted for my kids. And bonus, there was minimal work in preparation needed from me for there was even a weekly schedule set out to follow. I texted my husband. I felt so relieved and so happy. I cried all day, from the first time that morning that I started to read, and even for days afterwards I was crying. It was all wonderful, except I had one obstacle. It was Thursday. We were supposed to start school on Monday. Just 4 days. And don’t forget a Shabbos in the middle so no reading, learning or preparation then! To top it off, I had no clue how to implement the teaching. That was not going to stop me. We started our year of schooling on time.

This was the beginning of our journey with Ambleside Online.  The year was strange. I had never heard of Charlotte Mason nor of her teachings, and frankly, in the 4 days between first hearing about it and starting school, I was busy getting books printed, and preparing for Shabbos. After that, I was busy trying to teach. I did not get to do my due diligence and really understand. It took me a year to really figure out how we were supposed to learn with this new method, and by the second year I was definitely getting the hang of it and as I was understanding, my love for CM learning increased.

As it often happens, once we get into a routine, we keep chugging away. I have enjoyed learning with the boys. I really enjoy the books, though for the later years I do not get to read most of them. There are several that I would love to read, however, I might have to be content to wait until the boys have gotten older so I have the time to read. I was preparing for this coming year when AO’s Facebook page started getting really active. They have a forum, but I don’t normally go to that, and I tend to just stick with Facebook. All the wonderful questions and comments and even the help-me’s got me thinking again. I know my boys need more outside time, and besides the 105 degree weather we had for a while, there really is no excuse not to send them outside. We have not done the art or composer study (yes, I’m a musician… don’t ask, that is for another time,) and we have not done too much with the nature study or walks, though I have taken the boys out more and more each year.

I want to add more, but it is hard. It finally donned on me today why it’s hard. Yes, there are Bible readings and other religious books read, and all I have to do is replace them with our Chumash, gemara, mishnayos, dikduk and whatever else we are doing. However, when I looked at it, I realized that really, we are doing a lot more than what is laid out, which takes away time from doing other things. I don’t feel so bad anymore, but I really do want to do more, and I figured it out. I have figured out how to add in music lessons that the boys have asked for but I have failed to follow through with… each year… and I have figured out how to add nature study and our walks in every week. I am about ready to add in composers and their music – I’m almost done printing out short biographies of various composers – and I think I finally have a timeline and a Book of Centuries (a timeline for older children) that will finally work for us. I don’t think I KIMG1023can add in more, but it is all well. I do not consider the rest necessary for our lives and that is just fine. I have been doing some reading and getting chizuk (encouragement) from other AO members on the Facebook page. I was telling my husband about the nature studies I am adding and I told him I just feel so relaxed and happy about it all. I am still not quite sure how I want to do it, but that is fine, there are various ways and we will use trial and error to find out what works for us.

As we start our 5th year with AO, I am feeling more confident than ever. I almost feel like I am starting fresh and new. I guess I am. It’s a new learning year and I am ready with new thoughts and ideas to bring to our lessons that I hope will help make our children more well rounded and ready for whatever they intend to do in the (near – yikes!!!) future.

Wishing all of you a wonderful learning year!

Nachamu, Nachamu – Comfort

KIMG0964***I’m a week late in posting this – it was ready before Tisha B’Av, but I was having computer issues with inserting the pictures and then I was about to upload the pictures and come to find out it erased most of my blog. Guess it was not meant to be. Here is try 2!***

Time flies when your having fun, or just too busy to sit down and write. 😉 Between the 100 degree heat, adventures in Big Bend National Park, cooling down at the Macdonald Observatory to view the Moon, Saturn, as well as Jupiter and Venus, back to the 100 degree heat, staying cool inside, doing some cleaning and (finally) some organizing, and finding nice places to go walking in nature, I have felt constantly busy.

It has been a long time since we started our adventure to our new place with moving four times in about 4 months, unpacking an entire house in the few weeks before Pesach,KIMG0893 trying to finish up schooling, or what was called schooling for this year, and trying to figure out why things are just not settling down. It’s been about 3 months since Pesach finished, I thought we would be more than settled into a routine and start to feel “at home.” After all, when there are no boxes left in the house, it starts to “look” like it might be home, even if it does not feel like home. There really is nothing from stopping us from at least acting like we are at home. What we think should happen is often times different that what really happens. Reality was that I felt I have been treading water for the last 10 months, starting from the few weeks before we moved. I have been forgetting about appointments the last month, among other things, and we really have not been doing much schooling, so what has been going on?

No schedule. Oh, we have tried various schedules at different times over the months, and we can seem to stick with it for the most part, until the next change in our live (ie KIMG0813move) and then we go through a phase of what feels like chaos for we are not really doing school but we are busy doing needed things. Every month or two that is what has happened. After Pesach, when we finally were able to breath for a few minutes and realize that “this is it,” I tried to do schooling for a month or so to finish up the year, but I never could really get into a routine and always felt I was just treading water, never going anywhere. Yes, the boys went camping one week with Grandpa, we all went with Grandpa a few weeks later and last week I had one with the yearly-taking-of one-boy-out-with-Grandpa now. (Yes, I think Grandpa is happy we moved down here!) But still, I should be able to keep a schedule!

Then it dawned on me. What I am feeling is the lack of grounding. We are in a new place with new friends and Daddy has a new job with new hours, and there is nothing that is familiar for us (me) to hang on to when things change. Before, when our schedule would change, Daddy’s hours were fairly constant, and if his hours were crazy for a while, we had our daily school routine that was constant. There was always something to fall back on. Here, it’s been almost 10 months of all newness. However, over the last couple of weeks I think I finally figured it out.

It is summer and we can do our summer schedule, and really should do our summer schedule. Which is…basically nothing. We daven, do our chitas and are supposed to do our mishnayos and that is about it. It may not seem like a schedule, but we schedule in all2015-06-29_17-47-18 the nothingness, which when you schedule it in, it really is a schedule. It is something that we know, something that we do every summer, it is our grounding. We might be in a new city, a new house, have new friends and need to figure out Daddy’s new work schedule, but we have our familiar summer schedule. It has been such a relief and has felt like a huge load has been taken off my shoulders. I have been able to do some organizing and even gotten most of the way to organizing our new year. We have our new homeschool cabinet – the wet bar area that has been refitted with a bookcase (should not be surprising. 😉  ) I have decided on what books we will be reading this year and have purchased most of them. I have completed a first draft of the secular learning schedule (I do not feel quite comfortable with it but it is a really good start and I’ll mull it over for a few days.) I am starting to feel like I am standing on my feet on solid ground again.

Mr. Little has turned 6 and has lost his first tooth! He is so big that he planned for himself a birthday party and invited all his friends over. The only issue is that he did this all by himself without my knowledge! Baruch Hashem he did let me know on his plans the day before his birthday and so when I got phone calls from the children themselves asking if they were invited over for his birthday party, I was mentally prepared and told them that we were just having cake and they were welcome to join us in half an hour. 🙂

We just came from a very low time in the Jewish year, Tisha B’Av, the time when we 2015-06-29_17-46-47mourn our loss, not only of the Bais Hamikdash, but of the loss of our closeness to our Creator, our King, our Father. The good part is that once we are low, the only way to go is up. After all our moves and all the changes and challenges, I am finally feeling that our home is on the up as well. We have hit bottom. The elevator only goes up from here.

We just had Shabbos Nachamu, which is a special Shabbos for us personally, not just the comforting Shabbos after Tisha B’Av. (Okay, okay, DH and I got married Erev Shabbos Nachamu. 🙂  ) This year we also had dear friends surprise us and came over to spend it with us. It was so nice to visit with familiar faces. A beautiful family with a girl, and boys who were aged in between all our boys. It was a blast and also a comfort. How befitting. Nothing is coincidence. 😀 I feel refreshed and excited about our new year. I feel there are a lot of wonderful things in store for us this year. Wishing “y’all” all the best in your preparations for the coming school year!

Still Here!

20150106161823It has been a while, but I am still swimming over here and very thankful. Nothing is wrong here, Baruch Hashem, just really busy and preoccupied with life. It has been a mentally strenuous several weeks, and I think we are almost there with the first step. 3 weeks ago we found a house! Woohoo! That is such good news for that means I can let boys go outside and do things, and they can do things inside, such as jumping jacks, or somersaults, etc. It has been a little difficult for we are on the second floor of the complex. We hear how it sounds when people walk – the neighbours upstairs are really good, but even when they just walk, the sound is magnified so much, it sounds like they stomp at every step. I can just imagine how it sounds for the neighbours downstairs when there are 6 of us just walking. Never mind if a beautiful boy accidentally gets off the couch a little to fast and the steps are a bit harder than usual, or, chas v’shalom, something drops!

There is no place here for children to play outside – except on the computers or at the TV down at the office, which is20150119_114142 just too tempting. So, my boys are inside most of the time. 🙁 Don’t get me wrong – I am SO thankful that we have this place. It really is nice and laid out beautifully. The kitchen is huge and I could not have asked for a better kitchen, even in a house! It is just that I am looking forward to letting boys be a little bit more like boys again. They really need it (and so do I.) It has been a roller coaster of a ride trying to get this house and our realtor says we can now write a book on the process so we can help others. Hmm… my next book? 🙂 Though, in less than 2 short days we are hoping to sign and be almost there, with just the painting left to do before we officially move in.

It has been almost 4 months since we have moved here and I feel it has taken way to long to settle down into a 20150120_102249routine. Though, looking back, I think my goals were unreasonable. They say that after having a baby, give it a whole year to get your homeschooling back on track. Well, if just adding one more member to the family can do that, imagine what putting all your things in storage for an unidentifiable amount of time, piling everyone and everything you absolutely need to “survive” until that unidentifiable amount of time decides to end, drive across the continent, setting up shop in a brand new place with new people, new places to live, new cultures, new schedules, new everything, and then saying, “Ok, now be normal and go back to how things were before.” Sorry, you can’t do it – the “laws of physics” won’t allow for that. Now, you can hope for a nais (miracle) for the “laws of physics” to change for you, but I don’t think that is what we are supposed to do. I finally sat down a few weeks ago and was able to make a schedule of some sort with most of our learning on it. Whatever is on the schedule seems to usually happen. It is just the stuff that did not have a spot, or that I forgot to add and therefore are still not there that get missed, but we will, G-d willing, work on that. I am coming to the thought that maybe, just maybe we really are doing okay and the fact that it has been less than 4 months and I feel we actually have a fairly good routine (albeit not the best, but at least it is a routine,) that I should be fairly happy.

The boys are doing really good. We have our days, but it seems like the occurrence of those days is less frequent and20141229_171328 even when they happen, they are not as severe. The oldest has a full schedule with his college courses, and so I am not too involved with his learning now (*tears*), but I am still there helping him learn to organize when he does things. Trying to teach him to do a little of everything each day, rather than taking a whole day for one subject. One does not learn best that way. We are still working on that, but then it has only been 2 weeks since he has started, but I think we are getting there really fast. I realized during the first week of his classes that even though he does the work on his own, I really am still very involved in guidance. Every day. Multiple times a day. I am so grateful for that! He came home about a month ago and announced he was going to the Rabbi’s Gemara shiur every night before Maariv. He did not ask, he told me. Well, I can’t complain too much, he enjoys it, he is learning, he is keeping himself out of trouble, oh, and he can get there and back by himself. What more could a mother want?

I think the biggest and hardest change is the change in friends. It is hard to leave friends and then it can be harder to make new ones, especially if when making new friends you feel you have none to begin with (because you left them all behind.) Number 2 had it the hardest. He loves his friends and had a very hard time not only not having them but understanding that he can go make new ones and have double the friends. I think he is getting there. He met a new boy who moved to town just a few weeks before us who is also homeschooled. They have hit it off really well and he seems a lot happier now. Number 3 is my laid-back-go-with-the-flow kind of boy and really has settled down quickly and loves playing with their new found homeschool friend as well. Number 4 is getting there. He loves playing with his brothers (especially with the K’nex they just got!) and has always thought of them as his best friends. He is finding it a little hard when they all go out – learning, biking, etc. and he cannot go with them.  He is slowly getting bigger now and now goes to shul on Friday night and Shabbos morning with the rest of the boys, and lucked out and was able to learn on Motzei Shabbos with all the Dads and sons at shul (so he could get pizza and prizes as well.)

We are going to closing in less than 2 days, which could not have come at a better time for next Wednesday is Tu B’Shevat, which means my little Number 2, who was born the smallest and who is the tallest of the 4 right now is going to be Bar Mitzvah! Where did the time go? To celebrate,  we have lots of family coming over, and just last night the number doubled and more are coming! Wonder if I can keep the last group a secret until then? 😀

To add to the excitement, when people here found out that DH was a scoutmaster, we had many people BEG us to start a Jewish Boy Scout Troop here! So, what could we do since we have 3 boys we want in scouts who need to be in a Troop than to start one. It is official, we have adults and boys (and more joining) and are hoping to have our first meeting very shortly. We are in the middle of planning the first couple of meetings.

For me, it has been interesting getting up at 5:30 am, 7 days a week. I am definitely not a morning person, but I have found that it really gives me some “me” time. After getting DH off to work, and one boy to shul, I have a few minutes to veg out, exercise, shower and do some learning before I wake everyone else up. That was one thing that I was wanting in Rochester. I had a hard time starting our morning when we should have for I wanted to have my “me” time before the boys got up. Well, now I have it and it feels good to be accomplished so early! It helps make the rest of the day better.

Until next time, have a most wonderful week!

It’s Here Already?!?!?!

20140826_174130a Wow, is it really that time of year again? Wait, isn’t summer still here? I’m not ready. Usually I have a schedule ready 2-3 weeks before we start our learning again. Well, let me rephrase that for we are always learning; before we officially start our new school year. I tried to sit down and work on our schedule multiple times this past month, but something always took me away, including somehow being tagged as the parent who drove boys and friends to a nice creek that had a nice waterfall on an 80+ degree day last week. (Note to self: When you want to spend only an hour at the water in nice weather, don’t let boys go into water. Somehow they just won’t want to leave, and unless you actually go into the water to have them look at you, you can bet on them all of a sudden having selective hearing issues.) I finally wrote down what they are going to do, but it was not until last Thursday/Friday that I finally got to sit down and come up with a schedule. I don’t feel ready to start.

One thing I did keep in mind this year is that even though I love all of Ambleside Online’s schedule, we just will not go through all of the books. For example, there are always 3 bibliographies or similar kind of books a year, however, we usually only get through one. That was a hard thing to admit for it is hard to decide which books to leave out, they are all good sounding and I really would like to do them all. But, after doing this for 4 years now, I realize that we were not necessarily meant to complete ALL the books on the list, but it is a list of great stuff to choose from. My oldest was able to get through almost all the readings but some of the other boys are slower readers or the narrations just take a long time so it takes longer to do so the readings are split up sometimes into multiple weeks. (Yes, I know some people will split up each reading into multiple days, but we just don’t seem to have enough time to do that.)

This past week was busy. Other than finally finding time to make a schedule, Mr. Big has officially started school as a college student. (Yikes!)20140826_173235 Last Monday was his first day. Right now, all his classes have to be online for even though he might be mentally ready for the material (he did have to take a placement test to get in,) I am not letting him go to a physical class. He is still a child (at 13!) and is not ready for the college environment (at least that is what I say and I’m sticking to it.) It is a new experience for all of us. Us seasoned university graduates are trying to guide him in what he needs to be doing, and even though I did take an online course several years ago, it does seem to be very different than what us old folks experienced, though with being old comes wisdom and that makes up for all of it. 🙂 So his AO classes are limited and made up for with all the work he will be doing in his two classes.

For the other boys, we are almost set with our books. I would just like to get a different version of the King Arthur that they will be doing this year for I would like to get the version that has Librivox recordings to listen to. Librivox is a site that had free public domain audio books that are read by volunteers. Since many of the books used by AO are now out of copyright and in the public domain, there are many of the books we can listen to instead of having them read it or having me read to them. Last year we chose to listen to Robinson Crusoe. The reader was pretty good and the boys liked it. They followed along in their book and got to listen to someone other than their mother. It also gave me a break from having to read it for them (it is a very wordy book, something they are not quite used too yet and therefore harder for them to read on their own,) and I got to work with other brothers during that time.

Oh, I can’t forget the Big Mr. 5 Year Old. I have his schedule as well. He would not let me forget to make him one! Hebrew, phonics (Hooked on Phonics), math (Khan Academy, yes, they now have beginning math,) and one reading book a day of science, language arts or a free book of his choosing. When asked what phonics was, I told him it was learning to read. Oh my goodness, he was jumping out of the seat we were sharing with excitement! Before he would go to bed tonight I had to teach him to read. He wanted to read. I told him it was too much and he would not learn it in one day, but I did teach him a little of what we are going to learn tomorrow – A, “a”, apple. 😀

So, are we actually going to start our new school year tomorrow? I’m not mentally prepared to start school, and I don’t think the 2 middle ones are either, especially since one boy ended up today with 6 staples on his head from an accident, and the other came to me as he was headed to bed and asked if we were starting school tomorrow for he just didn’t know. We spent the entire weekend painting the house and not thinking about much else. So, other than helping one boy with his online Spanish and the math and biology we are doing, and teaching the ABC’s to another, I think we will start the learning with play-dough. Someone posted a great site that teaches about the chemistry of how play-dough works. There are a few chemistry words with definitions and good graphics to go along with it all. We can end the lesson with testing out how starch reacts to the different temperature of waters. I think they will all like it. I also saw a great site that goes into the science of chocolate chip cookies. I really want to do that one as well, though I think I will save it for something fun to do over Chol HaMoed Sukkos…I won’t feel too bad about having the hard part of testing out all the variations then!

Or, I can just take them all back to the creek with the waterfalls. 😀 I’m so glad we can homeschool!

Glancing Back at Summer

20140814_185833It is so refreshing to take a walk with my 5 year old. He is still young enough that he has a sharp eye for the things us bigger people just do not see. He did not want to come for a walk with me, but I dragged him along (literally had to do it for the first few steps, after that he was fine. 🙂 ) I needed out of the house and didn’t want to go by myself. We chatted for a while, found worms and slugs (a first for him). When we finally turned back around to go home, he hit the jackpot! No, not any chairs this time for it had been garbage day. (Baruch Hashem!) It was another amazing treasure for boys.  They might call it “Gold Dust,” but without the gold.

“Mommy, can I bring home some dust!?!?!?” (As if I need anymore dust in my house!) “It stays outside and does not come into the house.” “Ok. I need a bucket.” “Does it look like I have a bucket?” as I stand arms apart. I then precede to hand him an imaginary bucket. He laughs. I tell him to use his hands and carry it home.

He gathers some dust and we start to walk back home. He is careful, like a 5 year old, with his gold mine when I felt pity on him and started to wonder if he would have any gold dust left by the time we made it 15 minutes to the house. I offered to stop at a friend’s house on the way and ask if they might have a plastic cup or something we could have. Our friend found a paper towel and our gold was safe. Now, we had to make the trek BACK to the mine to fetch more dust.

We finally started walking back and found more worms and slugs. As we passed a worm, I bent down and gathered it up with a leaf to take it off the rough sidewalk and put it on the grass. He then told me to stop and he took out his dust and needed to put some beside the slug. I told him not to put it on the slug for that would not be nice, and he knew that, he just wanted to be nice and put it next to the slug. We then preceded to find more slugs so he could be nice to them as well. Not sure how that was being nice, but he felt it was the right thing to do. Cannot argue with a 5 year old!

It has been an interesting summer. I am still trying to figure out how it went. There is always 20140814_144503stuff we do not do during the year and I have been trying to make it up in the summer times. I think last year was the most successful year. I decided to work on that and have an even better summer with regards to things that needed to be done. I listed all the things we were going to work on this summer and made a schedule. It seemed like for a week or so things were going per my schedule, however, I did not like it. Something was missing. It finally dawned on me – I was not able to do my summer cleaning! For me, it was still like school. So, I decided to just keep the parsha, chitas,mishnayos, along with the new Gemara learning the boys are doing with their father (Makkos,) and one special project, everything else was ditched. I spent several days not doing much and feeling guilty about it (but not giving in to my guilt!) and by the end of the week I had a much nicer kitchen. I seemed to just have more time.

As some of you know by now, where we live we can recycle items by putting them out by the road. Last week my oldest came home:

“Mom, I need to get the wagon, I found a huge fish tank – with a stand, heater, light, filter, food and everything! Except the fish.” “We already have a fish tank.” (Not in use, but we have a nice 10 gallon tank.) “But Mom, this is a really HUGE one!” 😐 I try to explain to him that I am trying to get RID of things, not acquire more stuff. He was persistent.

“But someone let me put it on their lawn until I came back with the wagon!” Now he is making me feel guilty for he now has to fulfill a promise he made to someone.

I finally told him that he had to get rid of that amount of volume of stuff and he had to find a place for it. I even helped. I had him get rid of a broken 2 drawer cupboard for starters from the living room and he put the tank there. It is a 55 gallon tank. I made them check the seals of the tank in the tub before they were allowed to fill it up. In the end, the tank was filled in the living room and the filter turned on. After a few days the oldest took his hard earned money and bought 20lbs of rocks, a decoration, a backdrop and of course, two fish. The next morning we woke up to a nice surprise – a baby fish! We all learned something new – I thought all fish laid eggs, but there are also live bearers. So, off to the pet store we went to get a net to separate the little ones from the big ones, and we also got 4 more fish. It turns out we caught 7 babies in total, with 4 still alive. (Now is is an awesome time for the benefits of homeschooling! Love how we can learn, and in the middle of the day as well!)

I had been thinking that the summer was just not as nice as I was hoping, but if I look back and remember all the neat stuff that happened, and most were not planned, I realize that it did not turn out all that bad. Yes, there were things that I did not care for, but if things were to be different, all the nice things would have to change as well, and I am not willing to give up any of those. It is nice and comforting to sit and look at the fish. I enjoy peeking at the little babies every day.

In the meantime, I have done a little bit of cleaning in the basement and decluttering. I have a little bit more that I would like to do before school starts. I have decided on books for the boys and just have to put it into a schedule now, and before I get too worried, my not-even-14-year-old is starting college in just 4 more days! AHHHH! I’m fine, really, and I am so glad I am finished my schooling. I think it is time to look at the fish. 🙂

Wishing everyone the best in their new school year!

A Freilichen Purim!

20140311_163628Finally, I get a few spare moments to breathe. The last while I have felt like I have been going in circles, but it has usually been good. Somehow I have not been able to get much done other than teach and today I seem to have some time, but with it being a fast day, I am not doing much for I know if I do then it will come back to bite me.

A few weeks ago one little (or big?) boy of 4 decided he was going to be a big boy, and while I was busy teaching his older brothers he went around the house and did chores such as emptying the dishwasher and putting most things away, all by himself and ripping toilet paper for Shabbos (and they were all in even square strips!) When asked why he thought of those ideas, he responded that he did not want his brothers to have to do the work. <3 <3 <3

The weather has been absolutely crazy this winter. It was not so much the snow that came, but the COLD that came along with it. Yeah, yeah, I have friends and family who will remind me that I grew up in the cold and I should be used to it. I’m a wimp, and I’m tired of the cold temperatures hovering around 0 F and below (-17 C and below). I do not mind it staying around the freezing mark; I like the change in weather, the snow, the crisp air, etc. and then the warming up and seeing the new buds. It is also hard to send the boys outside to stretch their legs. Many times we had to tell our oldest not to walk to shul in the mornings for it was just too cold, or icy, or windy. Things were just starting to look a bit warmer this week and it was gorgeous for the chassanah that we attended on Monday, but that was just a little Purim joke. And to mention that many of those people have moved out of the cold climate themselves.

On Tuesday afternoon we played some hookie with the weather rising to about 57 F! Actually, it was not hookie, it was a much needed stretch of the legs for everyone, you see, I feel very proud of myself for when I told my oldest that we were going to play hookie, he looked at me and said, “Huh? What’s20140312_121042 that?” Ditching school and taking advantage of the amazing weather to finally get a chance to stretch legs and soak in some sunshine and fresh air for more than 2 minutes really is part of schooling, and he understands that as such. 😀 Most of the snow was gone and one boy even wore shorts. Then came the rest of the Purim joke – Late Tuesday night/ early Wednesday morning it started to come. It came and it came and it came. Boy, did it come. Within 24 hours we had about 16 inches of white stuff all over the ground. My oldest used the snow blower at least twice on the driveway, the last time being around 5pm. DH and I went out for a Sheva Brachos and came back at around 9 pm and it was a miracle we made it not only home without getting stuck, but into our driveway! The snow was higher than the bottom of our van! And that was just 4 hours worth of it.

Schooling itself has just been okay. I put our schedule up on our living room wall for all to see. It is a good schedule, I just find myself missing out on things every week. I think the problem is more me than the boys. I have to really have my mindset to be ready by 8 am. We are not scheduled to daven until 8:30 am but I have noticed that my mind is just not ready. Something for me to work on. It is nice to have some quiet/me time before we start and I am up and physically ready, just mentally I am not. Perhaps if I take the time the boys are getting themselves ready (7:45-8:30), i.e. cleaning one bathroom, sweeping the floor, or other small task, I will feel a bit accomplished right at the beginning and that will help motivate me. I did notice that this morning when we got up at 5:45 am to eat a bit before the fast and I took about half an hour to wipe the kitchen counters and table and straighten the living room. I did have the drive to continue on, and would have if it were not a fast day. So, that will be my next task.

20140311_163641We did go out on Tuesday night to get some more firewood in anticipation of the cold weather the next day. We did order a cord of firewood in late December, but with the extreme temperatures (my husband told me this morning that this has been the coldest winter since 1912!) we had only 4 logs left. We had a nice fire for a few hours yesterday.  I would have started one more fire today, but there was not enough to make it worthwhile.

In the meantime, I need to make supper now – have to feed some bellies! Wishing everyone a Freilichen Purim!

p.s. Just an update on our new bookshelves – it really has helped out a lot. Some days it gets messy, but it is really easy for boys to pick up the books and they are so enjoying all the beanbags we have in there as well!

Finally!

20131114_084538After a Bar Mitzvah (and since we did a Thursday morning service, we even got pictures!), lots of family (Baruch Hashem!), vacation over Thanksgiving to visit more family, Chanukah, and school reports written and sent in, I think we are ready to get back to some normality again. Not all family was able to come, but the ones that were able to come meant a lot to us. My sister brought over 5 cousins to play with, along with her husband. We were also blessed to have Saba and Savta and one brother over. It is so nice to be able to celebrate with family. We had 16 people stay over in our house and it reminded me of the story The Relatives Came by Cynthia Rylant. I played the video narration of the book for everyone since I could not find our copy of the book to read. I could not help myself and after the first set of visitors left, I transcribed the book, adjusted the words to make it match our family, chose photos to go with the words and voila! I had a photo book full of our memories. Lots of laughs and lots of fun. (My youngest came up to me this morning for he found the missing book!)

It always seems to take a bit to get back into a routine, especially after several weeks of being out of one, though I think we did pretty good this week. We are trying to do as the schedule says, but it does not help too much when I am late at getting myself ready – I just cannot seem to be able to want to get moving in the morning, however, once I am moving it is not too bad. Our schedule has changed over the past month; there is no more Amateur Radio classes for the older two boys, some extra music teaching students have changed days and times, Mr. Bar Mitzvah boy is not laining but he is going to shul for all three minyamin now which is making the late afternoon a bit harried sometimes, and both older boys are happy to be attending chavrusa learning twice a week which has changed some of our evening plans (but I really cannot complain that they love learning!) I really need to be able to sit down and think a little bit about how to make everything work out. Today was a really crazy one and nothing seemed to really work out as it should have.

The really crazy thing is that I am all of a sudden finding spare time during the day – during teaching time! I am not sure how that is happening. I am even 20131114_084941looking at the chart I put on the wall multiple times a day to make sure I am not missing anything. I honestly am not sure what is different, though I try not to complain and try to find things to do such as sweeping, mopping, folding laundry, etc. Though I do admit that sometimes I just sit down… and do nothing, and feel weird about doing it.

I have been working on trying to be more organized. I have tried it before with varied success. I hate coming into the kitchen to work with kids and the clean kitchen from the morning is no longer there. I can clean a house, but it never seems to stay anything like it should. I have been thinking about trying to keep the house better in a different light. It seems to me (at least it does this week,) that organizing a house is like going on a diet – one can go on a rampage and do a house cleaning, but it will not likely stay clean. Same for a diet – one can loose a lot of weight all at once, but almost always those “diets” are very short lived. I am trying a different way; I am slowly re-organizing things so it looks cleaner, and trying to keep the new re-organizing before adding new things to the plate. My goal is to eventually get to the point where everything is usually in the right spot, more often than not, and when it is not, it does not take that much time and effort to get it there. I have been thinking of ways that will work for our family, using how the members in our family work. Reminds me of how I teach; I have to use the strengths and weaknesses of each child and tailor my teaching accordingly. I find that instead of thinking, “this person SHOULD be doing this, or that” and then getting20131114_091303_a annoyed when they don’t, I try to think “this person is not doing what I would like them to do, how can I get them to do it?” I have a feeling that my organizing process is going to take the next, oh, 14 years or so? 😉

Rolling on to a connected thought, a friend posted a wonderful blog from a stay-at-home mom. So, I will not mind if my house is not organized like I want for the next 14 years or so, for I plan on treasuring seeing a 4 year old all bundled up from being outside in the cold and the snow and walking like a penguin, while I walk towards him the same way and we both laugh. I also plan on tucking away memories of putting children to bed and at 11 pm at night I still have all boys up and awake and not sleeping. IMG_1656_a(Should I get them up extra early in the morning? 😉  )

Phew!

20130908_203152I hope everyone had a wonderful Rosh Hashanah. It was beautiful over here; not too hot, not too cold, and we even ate outside for one of the meals. If the holidays have crept up on you making it difficult to finish planning some of your teaching, or if you just are unsure of what or how to teach the Judaics, Rabbi Resnick is having a free classes week in Room613. Feel free to pop on in by going here. His new 2013-14 schedule can be found here.

Having a fast day the day before school starts was a challenge – especially since DH wanted us to go sell popcorn as well. Before yesterday, the boys did manage to sell $1000 in just 3 days by going just door-to-door! That definitely was a record for us. The new training we had for selling popcorn has sure helped so far. I have even set up several days in the next month were we are going to be selling at a table. I am hoping the new training will help us sell more there as well.  After all, we are getting over $4000 worth of popcorn this Friday. Anybody hungry? We even accept credit cards this year. (Don’t be shy, there is plenty for everyone!) 🙂

Yesterday I was running around in a panic – I made my schedule for the boys last week. Even with an added boy to the list, I was still able to get it all on 2 pages. The problem was that I was missing one of the pages – and it happened to be the one I needed for the first day of school. It did not help that there seems to be papers that have decided to procreate, making the kitchen look quite hideous. It is amazing how that happens. Baruch Hashem I found it before I felt I should try to make a new schedule. It took several hours to create the first one. As it was, I did have to recreate an evening schedule, however that was not terrible. The boys ended their day with a green smoothie and Ryvita crackers for supper along with green back-to-school cupcakes for dessert. Thought that would be a great way to start the year off. I even went through the schedule with all 4 boys separately before they went to bed so they would know exactly what to expect from the new year.

The morning started off on the right note. Five out of six of us were up, dressed and ate at the same time. Just the little one was in bed, but he did not have to start at the same time as his older brothers. The boys even got to daven with their father instead of davening with me. Breakfast jobs were done on time. I was feeling great. Everything was going as it should. And then I made *the* mistake. Yes, the one that threw the ENTIRE day off.

I DID NOT CONSULT THE SCHEDULE! 😐 Yes, the same one who said that even after a full year of doing the same thing every week she knows how it is so important to still have a physical schedule to help keep everything going like it should, did not even look at the schedule this morning. The morning of the20130909_214809 first day of school. I was so cool that I knew what everyone was supposed to do….. until 8:15 in the morning. How did this happen? I am not sure. I must have been a bit over confident that I knew what was going on until around 11 am that I did not even bother to look. That may not seem like the end of the world, and I would have thought that a small mistake would have been just a little ‘oops’, but that little ‘oops’ affected our entire day. What happened was that I thought that since the boys davened earlier with their father than was listed on the schedule, we had extra time to catch up on some mishnayos that the boys got a bit behind in because of the Yomim Tovim. That would not have been the end of the world if it were not for the fact that we totally skipped out on one of the subjects for each of the boys and I did not realize it until about lunch time.

One boy did not consult the schedule very closely either for he ended up missing a second subject. We did catch up one subject, but it was too much for me to fit in the second one, even at night. Between getting ready for his Bar Mitzvah in a few short months (oh my, where DID the time go?), working on his SAT vocabulary and SAT math (aka algebra) for the SAT he is going to, IY”H, take in January, and the extra subjects he is taking because of his grade (and selling popcorn), we are sure keeping him busy and out of most of the trouble.

That is not mentioning the one boy that was not feeling up to par today with a headache and had to lay down a few times, missing some classes, a boy who tried being a challenge. I think the mild headache I had all day until supper time was due to the amazingly, crazy first day. On another note, I did have ONE boy who got all his work done, even did his organ practising. Must have been the extra morning sleep. Baruch Hashem, there is always the good, just sometimes it is harder to find. The nice thing is that it is always there; if you look, you WILL find it. 🙂

As I am typing, I sit here feeling almost bored. The good is that as soon as I pick my eyes up from the computer screen I am reminded that I am really not bored. I have dishes to clean, tables to empty, the rest of the papers to put away. And that does not include the laundry that is so patiently waiting for me (and most probably procreating as I type.) No, I do not have to worry, I am not bored. I just wonder how long I can keep my eyes on the computer screen…

20130908_175018Sweet dreams and I really should get a little more friendly with my dishes. Tomorrow is another day, and that means the potential for a great day (and humbly remembering to look at the schedule!)

Back To Work!

I can’t believe it has been 7 weeks already. Last week DH went into the doctor’s and was given the okay to go back to work. There are mixed feelings all around, but life goes on and Baruch Hashem his foot is healing properly. He still has one more week without being able to put pressure on the foot, and it will take a bit before he can think about his dream of running a marathon 😉 but he is definitely on his way.

As my newest role as a caregiver to my husband 24/7 changes to something like 6/5 and 24/2 I can actually take half a breath and take a look at how things went. The first several days after the accident was just a blur. We were all just trying to manage and survive. From traveling back and forth from the hospital to home and back again several times a day, to trying to keep beautiful boys quiet so Daddy can sleep was a job in itself. One of the challenges of homeschooling children is when someone is sick you still have everyone at home. I do not know about girls, (and yes, even though I am one myself!) but I do know that one of the big things boys like is noise. One boy loves to make various (um, annoying) sounds, one boy just has a loud, deep penetrating voice and one boy is not old enough to remember to keep his high shrill voice down to something manageable to others. Somehow we managed. We made it though and life went on.

I would have loved to have just spent time with my husband over the last 7 weeks, but there were 4 wonderful reasons why I couldn’t do that. I guess they were a good thing. Well, I know they were a good thing. I tried to continue on with our schooling as much as possible after the first week. Except for when there were doctor visits, we actually got most things done. Except math. I think the one thing that kept us on track as much as possible was the fact that the boys had scheduled times to log onto Room613. The fact that they had classes that could not wait 5 minutes before starting was such a big help. I use that time to teach other classes to other boys. The problem with math is that I have it scheduled at the end of the day AFTER their classes with Rabbi Resnick. By the time 3pm came around, Daddy was going crazy and looking for TLC. I cannot blame him.

I still have a hard time imagining how difficult it is to need help with everything. Even making his way to use the bathroom was a production. He couldn’t get up for a glass of water, if something fell he was at the mercy of whoever was around (if anyone) to help him pick it up and trying to take a shower to feel human was such a long process. I know he tried hard not to ask the same person for help all the time (Baruch Hashem there were 5 other people around!) but he felt so imposing that he even went to far as to try to not ask anyone for help. For that I have constantly given him mussar. I never once felt like he was imposing and tried to make sure he saw me with a smile, even if he had to ask me to get up in the middle of the night. But I can understand.

Having to juggle between putting on my teacher’s hat and my caregiver’s hat took a lot out of me – and my time. I had scheduled extra time in between classes to help give me time to do a bit of cleaning here and there and to help spend some quality time with Mr. Big Boy #4 and yes, even some down time for me, but that was all taken up with my other new career. I have to admit that Daddy was really a good sport and usually told me he could wait for whatever it was until I had my break though that did make me feel bad to have to make him wait. What all this really meant for me was that I was constantly on the move. I had no me time, no time to mop the floor, no time to give to a little boy, no time to do nothing. By the time 3pm came around, I was doing my hardest to try to get myself to make supper, never mind math. DH mentioned this morning, “Oh, you were not on the computer yesterday?” No. That is another thing. No computer, no internet and no email – no time.

Then, after looking at house, I decided to implement a secret plan. I spent the last 4 days working on it. I am not finished, but I am a long ways over, and by now it is not secret. I made the executive decision to move all 4 boys into one room. Yes, one room for 4 boys, a 1:4 ratio. We have a 3 bedroom house. I know. You can tell me that the past 6 weeks turned me crazy.

Really, I am doing this to help out a very creative boy (see previous post!) as you can tell from this embarrassing photo (which was about half

Half way cleaned up by Mommy.

way through the cleaning!). This was the amazing job of one boy over the course of just 2 months. The entire floor actually looked as bad as the part still covered in the photo when I first dared to go in and clean. Yes, only 2 months! I go and wipe out everything in the room every few months and try all sort of tricks but so far nothing works. I am just lucky to have one of these amazingly creative boys that just are unable to keep anything clean. I have talked to several Mothers over the past year or so who have similar minded children. It is good to know it is not me. I went ahead and got even more crazy, picked out a nice real color and started painting the walls. Not even DH knew what my plan was until the night before I finished painting. Boys helped me put together one set of bunk beds last night, and they all helped me organize clothing. I have decided that since there will be limited space in this room now, we can’t have 4 sets of drawers. I bought each boy 4 storage bins that fit under the bed. We are not done, I still want to get each boy a nice sized box with a lid and a combination lock that is their personal property.

As far as the new room, I am not quite sure what I am going to do with it. I do know that I want my sewing machines to be in there so I have a place to sew, but I do not need a lot of room for that. We shall see. The green I picked out for the boys is good for the boys but not what I want for any other part of the house. It was nice to have boys tell me I was doing a wonderful job and that they were liking the room and the color. It was also fun to have them all ask me whose room it was going to be only to be told, “I will tell you when I’m finished!” I was busy the entire day – from painting to preparing meals to cleaning two bathrooms down to mopping them, taking Daddy and one boy to the JCC to exercise and hang out in the pool, to shopping and then finally exercising myself. By the time we got home and organized clothes, it was 10:30 and the boys were STILL UP! How did it get so late? Then to walk into the kitchen and feel that everything went wrong and that perhaps my priorities were totally wrong. Perhaps I should have spent all that time I spent on painting on cleaning the house. Perhaps a pent up Daddy would have been happier? He tells me it was not me and not the house just the circumstance of him being pent up, but perhaps I could have alleviated things a bit by having different priorities. I don’t know.

Almost done!

What ever the case is, I cannot turn back the time and DH really likes how I did the boys’ bedroom. Today is MLK day and schools are closed. We are a school so we will be closed as well. I usually have school on statutory holidays for why not? But today, we are being flexible and I am not going to feel guilty. Today, we are cleaning the house, I am going to practice my music for the girl’s middle school performance tomorrow and we are going to try to get two sessions of math in. HA! That last goal is really funny, but I’ll really be satisfied with one session for each boy, but don’t tell them that!

I drove my Dear Husband to work this morning. Things there have also gone through a change. We are not sure what Hashem has planned for us, but after the past 7 weeks, we know that no matter what, everything really is for the best. I am going to miss seeing his wonderful face during the day. I think that I will like retirement. In the meantime I have something to look forward too, and oh, I think we shall be able to get a few more math lessons in in the meantime and the house is getting cleaner as I type. 😉