First Day of School

Well, today is the first day of school and my children have been given the privilege of sleeping in.  Yes, so now you are believing the stereotype of homeschoolers sleeping in and going to school in their pajamas, etc.  I will tell you that is not how I run my school.  Normally.  But today is not a normal day.

This last weekend was a 4 day weekend for Daddy.  He got Friday off as well as Monday off.  The boys had fun making a 10 meter antenna for Amateur Radio (Ham Radio for short,) watching Daddy climb high up in the tree to hang it, and I think they even tested it a little bit.  The antenna is not finished, but almost.  On Sunday, the boys went flying in a private airplane with the Scouts and had a wonderful time, and then we all went camping.

The car was packed and we headed straight out to Ossian State Forest.  We found our way to Evergreen Pond where there was supposed to be a primitive camping spot available on a first come first serve basis.  The camping area was right off the road, and we sat down at the picnic table and decided to stay.  We even saw a lot of road kill, just in case we were hungry. (See picture of frog) 😉  After hearing a shotgun and my husband actually SEEING the hunter and yelling at him to be careful and the hunter very recklessly swinging the gun around and apologizing, we decided it was not the place for us.  So, with strict orders to the older boys to sit at the table and not move, we took the younger one and off we went to find another spot.  It was not long before we found a nicer spot – off the main road, down a path, with a fire pit and wood available for us to use.  (You are not permitted to bring wood into the forest for potential of invasive insects coming and destroying the forest, but you are permitted to use wood found in the forest.)

We had a blast!  Two tents were put up, fire was started and the boys had fun roasting potatoes and having baked beans for supper.  We put the fire out and went to bed.  The boys went to bed really good – almost immediately!  The next morning the boys got up quite early surprisingly, however, that did not help them in packing up their tent!  They just could not get it done in less than 2.5 hours!  (Don’t really blame them, I hate packing up as well, but it needs to get done!)  To try to help them out I said no breakfast until it was finished.   Not sure it helped 😉  but we finally got everything packed up, a new fire made for coffee that was accidentally left on the counter, davened and ate.

We finished and packed up the few remaining items around 12:30.  Nothing had gone the way my husband wanted it to that morning (and it did not help that I forgot the coffee!)  However, we left, got some coffee and spent some time walking around a Lowes that we found in the area.  We decided we were just looking at ladders (for the antenna!) and we had no set time to leave.  I made lunch before we took off again.  We were going to try to do a geocache before going home.  We went to Hemlock Lake – that is the lake where we get our water from.  Unfortunately, there were a few grumpy people, and when grumpy people are in the same vehicle, it affects everyone for there is no room to go and hide.

We ended driving around to the west side of the lake and finding a trail down the forest.  The plan was for the four big boys to hike in the old growth forest around the lake to a meeting point on the other side.  The littlest boy and I were going to meet them over there in the van.  DH took his phone with the GPS on it and a Ham radio for the phone did not have a signal very reliably.  This was around 4:45pm.

Everything went fine until they had traveled a long ways, the trail ended and they went bush wacking.  Then the phone decided it was going to get ready to die.  I was given a few location coordinates before the phone died.  The area was very marshy and full of thickets and wild roses, making it extremely difficult to walk through.  It was not until about 7:30 that I started to get really worried.  It was almost sunset.  It was going to be getting dark very soon.  I told them to turn their radio off for a while to make sure they would continue to have battery when needed.  8:20 I called 9-1-1.  The lady dispatcher was very nice and helpful.  She dispatched the sheriff who was a few towns over, so it took a few minutes to get to where I was.  She stayed on the phone with me and we kept tabs on what was happening to the boys.  As we were trying to narrow down their location, the sheriff came and we drove to where he thought everyone might be.  He shined his light in the forest and yes, boys saw it!  By this  time there were more police cars driving around at various spots, that I only found out later.  It was not that much longer before they were on their way and close to coming out of the forest.

They came out at a different place to where I was at the moment and the sheriff and I drove to them.  Around 9:30 they finally made it out! As they climbed out one at a time, you can be sure that each one got a hug!  My oldest was a great trooper, never complaining, just chugging along in the bush.  Another boy was almost in tears – he was scared and was just so glad to be out!  The third boy did not say much other than smile and say he was glad to be out.  The biggest boy?  I think he was a bit dazed.  I do not think it really hit him fully until this morning.

There were almost a dozen police cars, fire trucks and ambulances over there.  I want to thank the Livingston County Sheriff department and the Springwater volunteer ambulance and everyone else that came.  Obviously they were just Hashem’s messengers and even though we need to thank them, it was ultimately Hashem’s doing that they were found that quickly.  I also thank Hashem that the batteries in the radio lasted the entire time, for without the radio it would have required a whole lot more time and energy to find them!

We finally got home around 11pm.  We had not eaten supper, but I made everyone hot chocolate and they got as much orange juice as they wanted.  Other than being smoked out from our camp fires, they needed to get clean from their hike!  After getting clean and filling the tummies a little bit, they were all tucked into bed.  It was then that I told them they could sleep in on the first day of school.  I finally woke them up at 10 am to say brachos, eat and clean the table.

So now, the biggest brave boy is at work, and the others are in Room613 for the open house.  The little one who did not have a bath last night just washed himself and is getting dressed.  The day will involve our math like we have done in the summer, and the afternoon is going to involve emptying the van and perhaps washing it (if it does not rain!)

So that, my friends, is why my boys got to sleep in on our first day of school.

Getting Myself Ready – My Chizuk

Yes, I know that experiences cannot be equaled and in case I was not sure about it, after the past few weeks, there is definitely no doubt in my mind.  Over the past week and a half, our boys have spent many, many hours outside, in the water – ponds, creeks, etc. playing in the sand, feeling the seaweed, smelling the different smells, watching lobsters hide, seeing small schools of fish, as well as larger ones.  Not to mention watching out for poison ivy and poison oak as we hike through the neighboring forests and seeing, feeling and smelling all the wonderful things there.  Charlotte Mason definitely knew what she was talking about when she said the only science a child needs for the first 6 years should be nature study.

We have been doing Ambleside Online for 2 years now, and I could never really fit in nature walks like I should, even though I wanted too, and I thought I tried.  I am hoping these wonderful experiences will encourage me to try harder.  Really, it all boils down to having the right schedule.  I find that I can stick to a schedule pretty good if I have one (and I’m the one that makes it, which is good!)

We are told that to raise good and happy children, the relationship between the mother and the father must be a good and happy one as well.  One of the ways to attain this is to make the relationship between husband and wife a priority over the children, that way the children can see how a good relationship should be and how they should act, for seeing has more of an impact than telling.  Homeschooling is not only about the children, it is about us, the teachers as well and therefore we need to nurture ourselves and take care of ourselves first.

We are just a few short weeks from Rosh Hashanah and we have had the most amazing few weeks. We do not get to interact very often with homeschoolers – we do not really have that much in common with the ones we know who are local, and to interact with religious Jewish homeschoolers on top of that is even more of a bonus.  Don’t get me wrong, it is not that I have an issue being the “different” one, not at all, however, occasionally it is good to meet others who are different like you.

It was good for the children to be able to play with other religious Jewish homeschoolers, and it was good for me to be able to talk to not just one, but two mothers who have similar philosophies as we do.  It was so exciting to talk to mothers who have had at least double the amount of years of homeschooling behind them than I do for it gave me a chance to see where I could be as a homeschool parent – what kinds of ideas I could try to use, from “experts”.   I was also glad I was able to share some of our experiences and see that I could be of some help as well.  And, it was nice just to talk!

I once heard from a rabbi that all the spiritual connection and chizuk that we get from Rosh Hashanah through Sukkos is set so that it carries us through the dark times of winter, yes, we have a little bit of light from Chanukah, but there are no Yomim Tovim until Pesach, and our neshamas need the spiritual connection.  So too, I felt that Hashem has given me this boost of the visits of two wonderful mothers (and their children!) to help give me chizuk for the next while. I felt lucky to have such wonderful conversations with one of the mothers that came.  We took the children out in the afternoon and then they still did not have enough time together, so her son came over for a sleepover.  After the mother left, I felt not only spiritual happiness and chizuk, but I found it gave me chizuk in general to do some stuff around the house that I was trying to get done.  I tried to soak up all the chizuk and spiritual connection that I could so that it would carry me over until the next encounter.

 

 

Re-Evaluating

The last week started off wonderful.  After our wonderful relaxing time at the park, we went to bed with the news that a friend of ours got engaged. We were, of course, very excited for him.  When we first met him, he was in college.  During the years he was in college we got to know him fairly well and always enjoyed his company.  He has since left town and is working.  We have had the opportunity to talk to him occasionally since then and we are impressed at how much he has grown since we first met him.  Yes, I know, years and experience will do that to a person, but there is also the influence of everyone around you as well.  I felt that, or perhaps it was just that I hoped that, we had some small part in this growth.

I then got to thinking about my own children.  Parents are always wanting to do the right thing, to raise the best children, to instill all the good middos.  The question is are we doing it?  I have been busy working on our new school schedule this week.  It is a great time to think about the direction we are all heading and what needs to change.  I do not think it is a coincidence that the new school year happens to be at the same time Rosh Hashanah is.  (Well, not including exceptions such as South Africa and Australia!)

Three days of work and I think I have a fairly good schedule.  I believe I have learned stuff myself and have learned that even though technically we can get everything done by a certain time, life happens and it will not work.  I have remembered to put extra time in between each subject to leave room for boys not working like robots and taking a bit of time to find their stuff that is in their drawers, as well as to leave time for a certain 3 year old who demands attention at seemingly the “wrong” time, which really is not the wrong time, it is just that is his way of reminding me that I have forgotten about him, or so he thinks.

Aside from schedules, I also am in the yearly process of trying to rearrange our school area to make it the best it can.  Someone on one of my email lists sent a photo of their area – a 4×4 Ikea cubicle.  That way it makes things easy to organize.  We cannot purchase anything at the moment, so I’m trying to make my 3-shelf cabinet work very similar.  Each boy has a shelf for their books.  On top, I have drawers for things such as paints, pencils, erasers, and other non-book type items.

All that was the easy part.    The harder part is looking back at what worked for each child, and what did not.  How did I handle each child?  I definitely learned a lot this past year.  I too have grown.  How do I handle my three year old when he needs attention?  I have made sure I incorporated extra time in between subjects.  I have also included time where a brother gets to play with him and keep him occupied.  How do I handle an older brother who can get difficult?  I have found out that he also craves One-on-One attention.  That might sound funny to a homeschool parent who teaches each child separately to begin with, but it is so much more that meets the eye.  This child functions so much better and is a lot easier to teach when no one is in the room, or at least not moving (i.e. reading a book by himself and not talking.)  Math is best done after everyone is finished and I can give him my 100% attention and not be interrupted by others.  Giving extra chores when the wrong behavior is exhibited I found is a good end to many tantrums and keeps me calm.

It is also a time to look at the direction that each of us is taking.  We have made several changes throughout the year on how we run our daily lives (outside of school,) in order to try to steer our children along the right path.  When we see a negative trait peeking through too much, we have tried to correct it.  However, a new school year is also a good time for new road markers for the boys seem more readily accepting, or rather less suspicious (and therefore less arguing about our new rules), when we can find an excuse to incorporate the new road markers in with a new school year.

The introspection does not stop here.  Amid all of the work I am doing for our boys and our new school year, I also need to find a few moments to look at myself.  Am I the best parent, the best teacher, the best wife, and the best friend that I can be?  Yes, I have already done part of it by following the steps above, but there is more to do.  I have to work hard on being the best me I can be so that, IY”H, our children can be the best they can be.

Learning From Everything

We had an amazingly wonderful weekend – both Shabbos as well as Sunday.  Friday afternoon was rather wet.  It not only rained, but it poured.  However, since rain brings brachos, I definitely look back and see various brachos that we had the entire weekend.  It started out with two wonderful and amazing guests that we had, which made our entire Shabbos just wonderful, and it continued through Sunday and our afternoon in a park.

As some of you remember, we had the opportunity to attend the Jewish Homeschooling Conference in Baltimore at the beginning of May.  While there, our older boys became friends with 2 brothers.  When part of this particular family had to spend Shabbos in our town, on their way to camp, the 2 brothers asked to stay with us opposed to where the rest of the family was staying.  I had only briefly met the boys in May, but when they arrived on Friday afternoon, soaked from the walk from the car to the house, I looked at them and at their smiles and their eyes, I could tell they were really good boys.  I am not quite sure what any of the 6 boys did until Shabbos, but I do know they all were very excited and had a great time together.

You can usually tell a homeschool child from their peers, and these boys were no exception.  As my husband and I talked to them during the Shabbos meal, they felt very comfortable and very willingly engaged into the conversations.  The younger one (10 yrs) was the chattier one, but even with the older one (12 yrs) it was almost like talking to an adult.  Almost…There was still something very kid like about them, but it was all in a good way. 🙂

It was amazing the knowledge these boys had – about almost every subject that was brought up. My husband loves maps and can keep his nose looking at one for hours – the same one.  We have huge laminated maps of both the United States as well as the world on the wall around our table.  It is referenced very regularly.  However, this night, my husband finally met his match.  Apparently these boys also love maps and they were able to teach the rest of us, including my husband, a very interesting fact about our own country.  We found out that there is a tiny part of the state of Kentucky that is totally separated from the rest of the state – it is called an exclave and it is surrounded by the states of Tennessee and Missouri.  This piece of Kentucky is called Kentucky Bend.  Not to be outdone by a 10 year old, my husband was able to use this new vocabulary word to point out what he learned before going on his business trip to Spain.  Spain has exclaves as well in the northern tip of Morocco.  (It turns out, as I researched this now, there is yet another exclave of Spain just to the north, in France –Llívia.)

I enjoyed the visit, I know my boys did, and I think the guests did as well for as their mother picked them up after Shabbos, they were trying to convience their mother into making plans to come back home the same way so they could again stop off at our house.  In the meantime, I had to purchase plastic lacing for my boys have learned a new hobby!

On Sunday we took a drive to Oatka Creek Park, NY.  It was our first time there.  We were not sure about it at first, but it turned out to be just what we needed.  We found a little spot just off the path, but out of the way, right by the creek.  We brought our portable BBQ

and reheated some leftover chicken and potatoes.  After a nice hot lunch, the boys spent the next several hours in the creek, playing with seaweed, throwing stones, climbing trees.  In other words, just have a blast!  While the big boys waded in the creek (some barefoots, one with shoes!) the little one and I spent time observing an inch worm walk up the magnificent tree.

They say we can learn from everything and everyone.  As I look back at our guests, I’m in awe.  It was wonderful to hear different facts about Indians, geography, as well as meet others who know about the Crusades and other historical facts.  (Some of our boys have learned about the Crusades, so that is a bonus for us!)  Granted the mother has been homeschooling more than twice as long as I have, however, I think we can create that wealth of information in our children as well.  The tricky part is the how.  I have wanted to go next door to the library and bring home books for several years now, but I just do not have the time to go through the various books they have there and choose. I have also tried going in with a list of books (like about 20), but I usually only come out with 2 of them.  So, I think I will try to send the boys to the library and tell them to pick out books about a subject they are interested in.  They can choose a different subject each time, that way it widens their knowledge base.  This way, I hope to limit the books read to learning books, non-fiction and historical fiction books, and not all the other junk that is there.

I also would like to spend more time with nature, just observing.  I always liked hands-on stuff myself.  I remember in high school physics, one class my teacher would bring in magnets, and he would pass them around for all of us to feel and observe.  The next year, I had a different teacher, and this teacher was not in the habit of passing things around.  One time I did ask to take a look at whatever he was teaching about.  I think he was taken off guard.  He did give the items to me though to look at.

It was exciting for me (never mind my 3 year old) to watch that little inch worm.  It would occasionally stick out straight as a little twig on the tree branch when it felt it need to camouflage itself.  It was wonderful to listen to where a 3 year old thinks the tiny inch worm sleeps at night – under the huge hole in the ground by the base of the tree – a hole big enough for a 3 year old!  It was also fun just watching the older boys spend hours in the creek, exploring, observing, finding little shrimps and fish, throwing rocks, getting their pants wet, enjoying themselves to pieces and not realizing they are actually doing schoolwork!

So, as I am finalizing my schedule for the coming year, I am taking the inspiration from our guests and their mother and beautifulness of our Sunday afternoon and trying to put all of that into our year as well.

Room613 Class Schedule for 2012-2013


Class descriptions can be viewed by clicking here.

Main Schedule
* Classes with Rabbi Yosef Resnick *
NOTE: All of Rabbi Resnick’s classes are on the main schedule and are included in the Unlimited Learningmembership EXCEPT those marked “elective.”

All times are Eastern Time, except where otherwise noted.

Mondays
Morning
9:30 – 9:45 Davening Circle (*free and open to all member levels)
10:00 – 10:30 Jewish Thought: Hanhagos Tzadikim (Customs of the Righteous)
10:45 – 11:15 Chumash: parshat Chayei Sarah/parshat Toldot
11:30 – 12:00 Halacha I: Concepts & Topics in Jewish Law – Kitzur Shulchan Aruch Yalkut Yosef (and other texts)

Afternoon
1:00 – 1:30 Torah SheB’al Peh/the Oral Torah: Mishna (mesechta Sukkah, perek 4) and other texts
1:45 – 2:15 Nevi’im/Prophets: Sefer Shmuel I (beginning at perek 14)
2:30 – 3:00 Biur Tefillah: Insights into the Siddur & Prayer
3:15 – 3:45 Elective “The Thinking Jewish Teenager’s Guide to Life” (for teen boys)4:00 – 4:30 Elective  Talmud: in-depth study of mesechta Brachos and others

Tuesdays
Morning
9:30 – 9:45 Davening Circle
10:00 – 10:30 Jewish Thought: Hanhagos Tzadikim
10:45 – 11:15 Chumash: Parshat HaShavua/weekly Torah portion (textual study)
11:30 – 12:00 Halacha II: Rambam’s Mishneh Torah (various topics)

Afternoon
1:00 – 1:30 Ketuvim/Writings: Mishlei/Proverbs, Tehillim, and other texts
1:45 – 2:15 Nevi’im: Sefer Shmuel I (beginning at perek 14)
2:30 – 3:00 Basic Torah Knowledge: Yediot Klaliot & Musagim b’Yahadut / Fundamental concepts in Judaism (based on the Torah u’Mesorah books and other sources) 
3:15 – 3:45 Elective Hebrew Language Arts

Wednesdays
Morning
9:30 – 9:45 Davening Circle
10:00 – 10:30 Jewish Thought: Hanhagos Tzadikim
10:45 – 11:15 Chumash: parshat Chayei Sarah/parshat Toldot
11:30 – 12:00 Halacha I: Topics in Jewish Law – Kitzur Shulchan Aruch Yalkut Yosef (and other texts, rotating topics)

Afternoon
1:00 – 1:30 NEW! Jewish Service Learning; study of various topics in combination with community service: tzedakah, bikur cholim, etc.
*No classes after 1:30 on Wednesdays

Thursdays
Morning
9:30 – 9:45 Davening Circle
10:00 – 10:30 Jewish Thought: Hanhagos Tzadikim
10:45 – 11:15 Chumash: Parshat HaShavua (textual study)11:30 – 12:00 Halacha II: Rambam’s Mishneh Torah

Afternoon
“The Shabbos Trilogy”
1:00 – 1:30 Mitzvot & Halachot in the Weekly Parsha – Midrash, Sefer haChinuch, Ben Ish Chai, and more!
1:45 – 2:15 Shabbat Laws & Customs
2:30 – 3:00 Insights into the Weekly Parsha (not textual study) 
3:15 – 3:45 Elective for boys ages 7–9: Kriah, Stories, Parsha & More!
4:00 – 4:30 Elective Talmud: in-depth study of mesechta Brachos and others

Fridays & Sundays
Private classes & tutoring (please contact me to arrange private sessions)

 * Alternative Scheduling Option for LA Homeschoolers *
and all others who are not in the Eastern U.S. time zone
 If you’re in a time zone that makes attending our live morning classes impractical, this plan is for you. Our Alternative Schedule offers unlimited access to all of Rabbi Resnick’s afternoon classes on the main schedule. In addition, you have unlimited access to all morning (and afternoon) classes as complete audiovisual recordings, available any time of day or night.

The schedule is subject to change. If you have suggestions or requests, please let us know.

I was asked *THE* question

I am usually a very confident person, especially when it comes to our homeschooling, but for some reason, when *the* question was put to me recently, I felt very not confident and my mind went blank.  It is not like we have not been asked that question before – after all, we are now in our 8th year of homeschooling!  So, for my mind to go blank was very not like me.  I do not know why I froze.  It could have been just the way the question was posed, the tone of voice she used perhaps put me on the defensive side, and it could have been because it was someone who has known my kids for many years and all of a sudden she asked this question.  Or, just a combination of it all.  (Photo taken from here.)

Anyone who has homeschooled knows what *the* question is, it is the most famous question a homeschool parent is asked (and yes I can even hear some of you snickering!): “What about SOCIALIZATION? Do your kids SOCIALIZE?”

I think everyone understands the importance of these two words, but I am not sure how many people actually understand what they mean. Socialization means a continuing process whereby an individual acquires a personal identity and learns the norms, values, behavior, and social skills appropriate to his or her social position. In other words, taking children out to various places, stores, the market, etc. and teaching them how to interact with the various kinds of people from various walks of life is teaching them socialization. Socializing means to make social; to seek or enjoy the companionship of others. So, having my children become friends with each other and playing with each other (as well as some peers) would be socializing. (Definitions from dictionary.com)

I thought I saved an email from one of my homeschool email lists that had a beautiful response to this question, but for the life of me I cannot seem to find it anymore.  I would like to post it if I do find it.  In the meantime, I would like to post part of an article that was sent to me by my sister from the August 19, 2009 Homeschool.com e-zine. (The article can be found here.)

For centuries, children have learned socialization within the context of their own family and community. Institutionalized education is relatively new to the human condition. It is, and it always has been, through the home environment, that children learn the vast majority of their socialization skills.

Research supports this.  According to Home Schooling and the Question of Socialization by Richard G. Medlin, “Home-schooled children are taking part in the daily routines of their communities. They are certainly not isolated; in fact, they associate with–and feel close to–all sorts of people.”

He continues, “Home schooling parents can take much of the credit for this. For, with their children’s long-term social development in mind, they actively encourage their children to take advantage of social opportunities outside the family. Home-schooled children are acquiring the rules of behavior and systems of beliefs and attitudes they need. They have good self-esteem and are likely to display fewer behavior problems than do other children. They may be more socially mature and have better leadership skills than other children as well. And they appear to be functioning effectively as members of adult society.”

This and other studies support the irony of the socialization issue in homeschooling that we have known for years, which is that traditional schools are actually more on a path of de-socialization.  In traditional schools students learn to stay in a class to which they’ve been assigned and are grouped according to age and academic level, and generally with students from the same geographic area and socio-economic background.

So in a sense, as I like to say, many people are homeschooling because of socialization reasons.

That seems to sum it all up very nicely.  I take my children all over the place – to stores, to the market, on other errands that need to be done.  They learn how to talk to various kinds of people, and people of various ages.  Oh yes, they also get to play with peers, they attend Scouts and we try to get them into camps when we can, among other things.  Some other ideas for socialization are:

  • Getting involved with homeschool co-ops
  • Less structured homeschool gatherings
  • Local field trips where you meet people from all walks of life
  • Community events such as scouting, 4-H, sports, etc.
  • Volunteer.  There is usually a minimum age requirement, however, some places will allow a younger volunteer if a parent stays with them.
  • Don’t forget about online socialization.  There are many children who are registered in virtual online classes in which they meet and interact with other students.

As I am finishing up, our mailman just drove down the street after finishing his route, honked and waved to my boys as they were going on a walk.  They enjoy talking to him, and I think he enjoys talking to them!

I am posting a link to a very cute video.  When I told one of my boys I was going to include it, he quoted his favorite line (after only watching it 2 times and it was several months ago at that,) and the two of us had a very good laugh, so I hope you all enjoy it as much as we did!

Thoughts on Tisha B’Av

I hope you will forgive me if this post is not so into homeschooling like I would usually write.

I don’t do well with fasts usually, I think the big reason is because I have children and I have to move around.  My boys are, B”H, all getting bigger, and I was able to rest in bed most of the morning. With some migraine medicine I am still very functional, slow, but functional and for that I’m very thankful.

As I am typing, I have approximately 1.5 hours left of the fast.  Yesterday I went to a little learning group and as we were leaving, we were discussing that really is not that we should all have easy fasts (though we hope we all do,) it is that we should all have a purposeful fast.  All day today I tried to figure out how to have a purposeful fast.  What is the meaning of today, the saddest day in the Jewish calendar?  Of course there are the physical things we do such as not eating or drinking for 25 hours, sitting on low stools for half the day, not wearing leather and not anointing ourselves, but these are only for the outside, the physical body, what about the spiritual part of our body, our souls?  What are we suppose to do for that?

So, the big question is – what happened to cause this day to be such a sad day?  We know that there have been so many calamities that happened on this day – both the first and second Bait Hamikdash were destroyed, the expulsion of the Jews from England in 1290, the Inquisition of Spain in 1492, World War I was declared, and many others (see Ohr Samayah).  Why?  Why on this particular day?

We know over 2000 years ago, Hashem had just taken us out of Egypt with 10 amazing plagues, He split the sea for us to cross, gave us heavenly food to eat and we had just received the Torah.  We were poised and ready to enter the promised land, the land flowing with milk and honey.  But even after all of this, we were not sure.  Was it really a land flowing with milk and honey?  Could we REALLY believe Hashem?  Huh?  After all that we still doubted Hashem?  It is true.  We wanted to send spies to the promised land to verify what Hashem really said was true.  Hashem let us.  Twelve spies were sent to scope the land and then come and relate a report to the rest of us.  Then, a terrible thing happened. Ten of the spies told a negative report.  They spoke lashon hara.  Not only that, we believed the lashon hara and we spend the entire night crying.  Crying for nothing.

Hashem then told us that since we cried for nothing that night, the night of Tisha B’Av, that would be a day where we would cry for something.  Wow!  Hashem was being so cruel you may say.  Just because we cried, Hashem made this day to be full of terrible calamity for us.  Isn’t Hashem suppose to be loving and kind and caring?  This does not sound like a loving and kind and caring Hashem!

Let us take a look at the report that the spies brought back.  Yes, they said the land was indeed flowing with milk and honey and the huge fruits they brought back showed that.  However, there were also giants that lived in the land.  The spies said “בְעֵינֵינוּ כַּחֲגָבִים וְכֵן הָיִינוּ בְּעֵינֵיהֶם” (Bamidbar/Number 23:33) – “…In our eyes, we seemed like grasshoppers, and so we were in their eyes.”  Meaning, we FELT like grasshoppers so they must have thought we were.  The giants never said they thought we were, but we thought so, therefore we must be.  Grasshoppers cannot defeat giants.  We gave up before we even tried!

Who are we to say what we are capable or not capable of achieving without even trying?  We did not believe Hashem – the All Knowing, the One who created each one of us, the One who knows better than we what we are capable of, the One who performed all those miracles – and instead, we believed the lashon hara spoken.  It turns out it was a punishment that we brought upon ourselves.  It was us who turned this day into a day of mourning.

My older boys have been kvetching about each other all week.  Someone is always seemingly hurting another, and it is obviously always on purpose.  Obviously… to them, but not to me.  I finally sat them down and told them (again) the story of Kamtza and Bar Kamtza.  In short, a wealthy man had a friend, Kamtza, and an enemy, Bar Kamtza.  This man threw a party and the servant accidentally invited Bar Kamtza.  Bar Kamtza thought this man wanted to make up with him and went to the party, only to find out that it was all a mistake and the host was upset his enemy showed up.  After repeated attempts by Bar Kamtza to pay for part, half and then all of the party just so he would not feel embarrassed about being thrown out, his pleas were refused.  Not a single rabbi or guest at the party said anything to help alleviate the anger and tension between the two men.  In the end, Bar Kamtza set up a trick to get the Caesar upset with the Jews.  Not only did the Caesar get upset, but he destroyed the Bais Hamikdash. (See a more complete story here.)

We sat and talked about what that all means – to have strife amongst people, to always feel that people are out to get you.  What does that kind of thinking bring you?  The destruction of the Bais Hamikdash.  When we have strife with others, we are thinking only of ourselves and not anyone else.  We talked about how lucky they were to be able to become close friends with each other.  Most siblings are friends with peers, but not their siblings.  Friends will come and go, but siblings will always be there, no matter where everyone lives.  Baruch Hashem, my sister and I are very close, however, that only happened after we were both married. My boys have the opportunity to create an even greater bond by starting out loving each other now.  If I hand someone a stick, they will be able to break it very easily, however, if I give them 20 sticks in a bundle, they will most likely not be able to break it.  The same goes for brothers and sisters who are close and care for each other.  When we are all united, we cannot be broken.

Okay, so they understand that they need to love each other and help each other, but what really does that mean?  That means they need to start giving each other the benefit of the doubt.  Instead of coming to me crying every time someone touches them so that they can tell me what the other person did and get that person into trouble, it means they need to believe that people are not out to get them.  When someone touches them, or hurts them, they need to believe that person did not purposely mean to hurt them.  Perhaps the person did not know they were there, perhaps the person was just wanting to get their attention and did not realized what they did hurt.  It also could be that you got them angry and they reacted.

Whatever the case is, if we can have a more positive outlook at everyone – giving them the benefit of the doubt, that will prevent strife and help create love for others.  When we have love for each other we are united and hard to break – just like the bundle of sticks.  As this fast is coming to a close (just a couple more minutes over here – and yes, it has taken me that long to write and cuddle kids, and send them to bed!) let us take a few moments and reflect on our lives.  How is it that *I* can create less strife?  Who am I angry with and how can I resolve the conflict?  Are they really out to get me, or am I taking things out of context?  Should I be giving anyone the benefit of the doubt?  How can I create more ahavas yisroel (literally: love of Israel – more love for each Jew)?

When we are united we are no longer thinking just about ourselves, we are watching out for the entire Jewish nation.  We are also more careful to not speak lashon hara.  It is up to each one of us.  You may be thinking this is a hard and unimaginable task, however, remember not to quit before you try.  We *CAN* do it, we just have to try.  Let us not cry for no reason any more.  Let us trust in Hashem that we really can.  It is at this time Hashem will bring Moshiach, the third and final Bais Hamikdash and the final redemption, speedily in our days.

Vacationing in the Boonies

For one whole week we spent a wonderful time up in a cabin, on the top of a mountain, on 350 acres.  It was one of the best weeks we have ever had.  Grandpa came with us as well.  It was a nice cabin, with several acres of mowed grass around it, many more acres of unmowed grass  – the size of a landing strip for a plane, which, on occasion does land there, and hundreds of acres of just forest.  I think the only thing we would try to do different is to take more opportunity to explore the gorgeous forest and not wait until the second last day.

Since the cabin was a long ways away from any electric lines, the owners decided it would be to their economic advantage to install solar panels and have a backup generator instead of having to pay for the electric line ($40,000 vs. $80,000!)  That was to our advantage for several times we got to fly our new kite.  Unfortunately, only one new kite was able to be flown for there was not enough wind for the other two, but we had a lot of fun sharing.  When you get the kite up several hundred feet, you just need to sit there holding the string, the kite flies by itself for there is a lot of wind up there.

Monday we went exploring in the van.  We found out this week that one cannot always trust a map.  We had two different (both detailed with contour lines, etc.) maps, and they both showed a road going into a state forest.  However, when we arrived at the state forest, no road!  The GPS on the phone said there was no road, and the road sign said it was a dead end.  We know from experience that GPS’s are not always reliable either, and normally we just use them to see where we are.  We decided to take the only other possible road, which turned to the side.  We thought that might be the state forest for there was gate there and sometimes state forests and parks have gates.  We opened the gate and drove on.  Well, the road was not conducive to vans, but we drove on.  At one point we decided to turn around for it did not really look like a state forest road and then got stuck!  After walking around we noticed a house not too far in front of us and figured we were not on a state road, but how to get out?  Lots of man power, and B”H we had as many people as we did for even one less person and I don’t think we would have made it.  Lesson learned:  Trust road signs.

As we were making our way back home, trying hard to stay on the real road, we come across signs that state it was a real road, but that the bridge was closed 1000 feet ahead. Grandpa wanted us to stop, for the bridge was closed – read the sign!  So, we did, and most of us got out and walked the 1000 or so feet…… only to come to another sign, for cars coming the opposite direction that said….. bridge closed 1000 feet…. Uh, well, we just walked right on through and there was nothing wrong with the road.  Lesson learned: Can’t always trust the road signs!

Tuesday we went touring the Amish region.  It was interesting to see that people really do live a life almost identical to life 100 years ago.  We saw the horse and buggies (though that is nothing new for us where we live, but still neat to see it anyways,) wheat that was cut and stacked in the fields – 7 bundles to a stack, men plowing, men cutting up wood into boards and all the wood craft and quilt shops.  We stopped in a wooden toy shop and a couple of boys bought something there.

Wednesday was a trip on a steam engine!  TOOT TOOT!  Look at all that black smoke coming out of the top!  It was a nice, relaxing time for me.  3 boys wanted to sit with Grandpa, and that left me with just 1 and it was the perfect time of day for on the way back that 1 boy just wanted to lay there almost falling asleep. 🙂

Thursday we did some geocaching.  We found most of them.  We actually did a bit of geocaching the entire week, but this afternoon was dedicated mostly to it.  We also learned that not all state forest roads are maintained.  We came across one that had a fallen tree in the middle of it.  All 5 big boys went out to try to move it.  Unfortunately it was just too long, however, DH being adventurous as he was, decided we took enough of the top away that he could drive around it, over the mud hole, and that is just what he did.  However, he was smart enough to know that we had to find a different route out of the park 🙂

Friday it rained, and the boys ate popcorn and watched a few National Geographic DVD’s about pirates!  Challah and cinnamon buns filled the air Erev Shabbos, as well as the lack of electricity (B”H the oven was gas and still worked!)  To their credit, the owner showed up within minutes and got the generator started (it was supposed to start automatically when the solar energy ran out but didn’t.)  DH spent time doing orienteering work with the boys.  They learned how to read the map, and the contour lines on a map, along with other compassing work.

The rain was a nice welcome, for Shabbos was nice and cool.  We had all the windows open (like we had all week), but we did not need to  have any fans going, so Shabbos morning we woke up to the sounds of birds…and quiet.  It was so peaceful!  We made our first trek into the 300+ acres of forest and saw butterflies and moths and bumblebees and even a snake!  DH and I walked around the whole grassed area.  It was pretty cool to be at one end and look back at the cabin – yellow flowers all over the grass, I just about ran right through pretending to be Laura Ingalls in the show from Little House on the Prairie.  🙂

Sunday morning, the sun got up early, and so did I.  I spent most of the morning packing up.  We decided to walk down a path to a road and since Grandpa did not want to walk with us, he got to pick us up.  Such a beautiful trek – about half of the walk was done solely on property we rented, and most of the rest was in what seemed an “alley” between properties.  GPS was great this time!

On the way out, we stopped off at a Scandinavian festival outside of Jamestown, NY and got pictures of a life size replica of a Viking ship (a small one, more of a fishing boat – not the size of one crossing an ocean).  We ending up in Niagra Falls for pizza for supper and finally made our way back home.  All in all, we had a good time, and have lots of nice memories!  We even got to finish off Grandpa’s visit with a birthday supper for my now 3 year old.  Happy Birthday MA!

I was mistaken!

As I was pondering on the last post I did, I bumped into some information on the latest physics find on the Higgs boson particle.  I like physics.  My minor in university was physics.  That thought of physics reminded me about a picture that my husband took of me during our 10th anniversary trip to Wales.  We were walking around an old castle and I sat down in the middle of the courtyard, under, yes you guessed it, an apple tree!  The funny thing is that as I sat down, waiting for my husband to take the picture, an apple fell down.  Yes, Newton’s law of gravity works even in Wales!  So, yes, I have sat under an apple tree before and pondered and yes, another picture had to be taken with the said apple, and yes, it was delicious. 😀

On another note, I’m very actively working on next year’s stuff.  For some boys, I have basically all the materials, for another, I have decided that I need to do an interim year before he is ready to move up.  And for another, I have come to the conclusion that even though he will have just turned 3, he needs to have his “schooling” as well (whatever that means, and most likely it means more Mommy-Son time, reading a story here, playing a puzzle there – and calling it “school”.)

As I look back on the previous year and see what worked and what did not, the main thing that stuck out that REALLY helped was a schedule that was written down.  Having it memorized did not cut i; we had to have it in front of us so we could see it.  The only problem with that is all the papers!  I had printed off a schedule for each of the 3 older boys, and one main one for me, but the boys never knew where their schedule was, and the main one was sometimes very hard to find as well.  (I found it today cleaning – lost it the last 2 months of school, but it was right there where we usually kept it!)

I got an idea from a post that I read recently, that I had seen before, but it never clicked really well for it entailed printing out a whole year’s worth of stuff – and hoping I would not lose the binder in the meantime!  However, I finally figured out how to make it work.

I just ordered 4 – 11×14 white boards – one for each boy.  The idea is that I will write the schedule in permanent marker for each boy on their board and then post them on the living room wall.  Then, each boy can check off what they have accomplished as it happens or at the end of the day.  On Friday, if there is anything we missed, they can finish it for we do mainly a 4 day weekly schedule.  Afterwards, they can erase the board and it is ready for the next week.

I have also realized that I am the kind of person that needs to have everything ready at the beginning of the year.  None of this “I’ll print off 2-3 months’ worth of work at a time,” for after the 2-3 months I never seem to find the time to print it off, and we are always trying to work around that,  and printing it off is many times cheaper than buying a used book. (Note: We use books that are out of copyright and are usually available for free on the internet.)  I have also found out that many times (not always, just many,) I can print 2 pages on one page, double-sided, therefore saving some ink (for the font and pictures are then shrunk) and half the paper!  Most of the time I just use our b/w printer, however, if things are easy, I might print a picture or two from the book in color to spice it up a bit and make boys happy.   *Note: Make sure you test out a page first before doing a whole book.  You don’t want to find after printing it all out that the print is almost too small to be read, even by you.

I am very happy with how things are going.  I have had to rearrange some of my thinking a little bit.  For example, I know that I will probably have to purchase more ink before the summer is over, but I also know that the new ink will last me the entire year.  I also have other ideas on how to rearrange our school cabinet to make things better and easier for all of us.  I think these few changes will make the difference for next year.  I guess I will just have to wait and see.  Next summer I will assess it and go from there.

Imagining an Apple Tree…

Imagine sitting underneath an apple tree, with the limbs and all the green hanging down all around you.  Imagine finding a wonderful limb that you could sit on, pretending to go galloping up a mountain and reaching the very top.  Or, perhaps you would like to imagine bringing out your dolls and sitting inside your house of limbs with all sorts of interesting shaped rooms.

We never had apple trees when I was growing up.  I never went to an apple orchard until shortly after I got married, and then it was only once.  I have visited an orchard a few times over the last few years, but never had the luxury to sit underneath one.  However, I can imagine how it would be to be a little smaller and enjoying the shade of the trees.  I think the next time I go apple picking I will sit down underneath one of the trees and just imagine…

Why is it that I can imagine something that I have never done?  It is easy if you have a living book to read from.  A living book is a book that is written by a person who is extremely knowledgeable in the topic.  Normally these authors love the topic they are writing about and it shows in their writing.  The nice thing about AO is that they use living books.  I do not know about you, but I have always found textbooks to be very dry and hard to learn from usually.  With living books, I learn.

It is easy to learn when the author writes as though they are talking directly to you, in person.  I read to my boys (all 5 of them tonight!) about the orchard.  We learned that the apple blossom blooms only in May, and learned to wonder how an apple could come from those blossoms, after all, not everyone wonders but it is good to wonder.  We learned that the apple blossom has 5 petals and in the center it looks like there are pins in a mini pin cushion!  There is what looks like dust on the head of the “pins” and so we are calling them dust boxes right now, until the author tells us the real name. 🙂  Did you know if you took off the petals, you will be left with 5 green “leaves” and little pins with no dust boxes on them!  After the petals fall from the flower, a knob grows on the other side, and that, my readers, is the beginning of an apple!

Now, reading from a living book is wonderful, but it is no match for seeing it in person.  We do not have an apple tree in our yard, and since it is July, we would not have any blossoms on it anyways.  However, we do have rose bushes. What do rose bushes and apple trees have in common? (Well, I read ahead so I know!)  Let me tell you what I did after supper.  I took all the boys out to our rose bushes (the one we went to is an Alberta Rose bush variety.  Now are you getting the idea?)  Our roses have just finished flowering and the flowers are in the process of falling off.   Yes, the blossoms look similar.  We did not see the dust boxes on these roses for the flowers were shriveling up to die, but perhaps I’ll still find a flower in bloom tomorrow if I look on one of the other plants.  I did take my youngest over to the lilies that were blooming and see the dust boxes on them.  I even got him to use just one finger to touch the pin heads instead of pinching them with finger and thumb.  We both loved looking at the yellow dust on our fingers!

We each had the thrill of pulling off the petals and seeing the 5 “leaves” and the pins with no dust boxes.  Now, we looked underneath the flower, and voila! There we saw the knob!  Looking further around the bush shows knobs that were ripe and ready to pick and eat.  Wow!  It is amazing how much the rose bush and the apple tree have in common.  The nice thing about the rose bush is that we were able to see all facets of the plant growing at the same time, unlike the apple tree. (By the way, the rose fruit is called Rose Hip and is edible!)

We were very lucky today.  We cannot always finish a nice learning with actual testing of the reading, and I took full advantage of it.  Sometimes we can do part testing – for example, I first took my youngest to the lilies and that would have been wonderful in itself without being able to see the rest that we were talking about.

I believe it is very important that children – and adults alike – get to make these wonderful connections.  It brings all the things we learn to life and ingrains it inside of us – just like when we took the boys to see handmade replicas of Columbus’ two ships the Nina and the Pinta this past weekend!

The awe and warm fuzzy feeling that even I felt tonight as I went and picked the petals and saw the inside with the pins with no dust boxes is something I will most likely remember.  Even though this was a rose bush, I remember seeing pictures of apple blossoms and it was just as wonderful with the rose bush as if it was an apple tree.  If I am ever able to visit a blooming apple tree, you will be certain that I will put my finger gently on the pins with the dust boxes!